I don't know how to live. How many people do?

Kind of a heavy and melodramatic title but I've been thinking about what we do in our lives, the connections we make with people and things and what it all means. I've been wondering if it's the right way to live. I'm not sure about other people but I go to work at a job that I like "well enough" I'm not curing cancer or fighting crime or poverty, I have a loving wife and my heart swells every time I see her, I have a solid relationship with my family and a handful of good friends and many acquaintances. But I live in the suburbs of an ugly city, it's not a post-industrial revolution wasteland like many I've seen and heard about in the united states and the rest of the world, but I can think of at least five other places that would bring a smile to my face and fill me with joy each day I lived there. Still, location is only part of the equation for my happiness. There is no spirituality in my life, I'm a skeptic who very much wants something infallible to believe in something to tell me that there is a larger force or forces at work in the universe making things alright, and that there is some order or plan to the seemingly random events we all find ourselves hurdling through. So far no luck...

I think I'm going to try to work less. Maybe no more 14 hour days. Maybe I'll try to take a nice vacation once a year perhaps to one of the many places I've always wanted to go. Peru, Thailand, Australia or Japan.

I need to find some greater purpose in my life, and I don't think this is going to come from worshiping something, or even accruing wealth, I need a just and righteous cause. I want to help elevate humanity and maybe in the process of playing small part in that immense task I can elevate my self along with it.

I want to feel something. We call people who live outside the norm crazy or odd, those stranger souls that choose to live in a hut on the beach so they can surf everyday because it brings them a joy that nothing else in their life can match. Maybe we're crazy for doing anything but that. I think it's time for a change.